In our grandmother's generation, new mothers had a close-knit community to support them after birth. Neighbors would prepare meals, help with household chores, and care for the other children in the family. The grandparents would often be close by. Almost every woman in the community had nursed a baby, so there was a body of knowledge to aid with problem solving. Taking care of the baby and herself was seen as the mother's first priority.

This generation has professionals both in and out of the hospital to help with the clinical aspects of the support, but as a society we have very little social support for a mother's physical needs in the early days after her baby's birth. Families are overwhelmed and tired. Many new mothers are not comfortable asking friends and family for help. Instead they push themselves to be independent and meet their own needs.

Research has documented that the single biggest factor in breastfeeding success is not equipment, not physical health, not good luck, but support. With support, it's possible for the new mother to meet her own needs and successfully nurse her baby. It is important to develop her own support community before her baby is born, by establishing a core team of people who will organize the support the family needs after the birth of the baby.

Friends and family may purchase gift certificates for professional services: meal delivery, house cleaning, dog walking, or childcare for the older children. Use this guide to find these services if you are in need of additional support beside that of family and friends. Consider asking for (or offering) a service instead of/or in addition to the traditional gift of products at a baby shower or office party.

By Melissa Jonas, LM